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Thread: ***** Jokes...

      
  1. #1
    beerman's Avatar
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    Default ***** Jokes...

    ..and the like. Letīs hear them. Hereīs one of my faves:

    One day Thor, the God of thunder, is sitting on his throne when he begins to feel somewhat horny.
    So, Thor decides to travel down to earth and bang the hottest virgin he can find. After some time of searching from his other-worldry telescope, he finds the sweetest maiden, with long red hair and bosoms to Valhalla.
    Thor takes his quickest chariot to this cottage, where he meets the maiden in the field. He scoops her up, carries her inside and proceeds to bang her 24 times in 6 hours. He is a God you know.
    Afterwards, he returns to his realm and begins to ponder. He thinks, "You know, that was unfair. This poor virgin had never been with a man before, and now she may come to expect the same from any other mortal man. I should tell her the truth."
    So, Thor travels back down to the cottage. All is silent. He decides not to let it become awkward, and kicks the door down, bursts into the room and exclaims "I AM THOR!"
    The maiden, still sprawled on the bed, looks up at him and replies..." THOR? I can barely THIT."

  2. #2
    Medea's Avatar
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    Default Re: ***** Jokes...

    A cat walks into a bar and ....

    OH, wrong sort of *****?

  3. #3
    Viz-id/Vigilancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: ***** Jokes...

    There was this cat who loved to get drunk, so he went to the bar down town on the other side of the tracks. He stayed all night long and got so wasted he could barely stand up, much less walk.

    The cat starts to stumble on home. As the cat comes to the train tracks he doesn't notice a train as it is coming his way. The cat starts to cross the track and the train is right on him. Just as he crosses, the train goes on by, but the cat was not all the way over and the train ran over the his tail, the cat turns it's head to see were his tail is and the train cuts his head clean off.

    Moral of the Story: DON'T LOSS YOUR HEAD OVER A LITTLE PIECE OF TAIL!

  4. #4
    Viz-id/Vigilancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: ***** Jokes...


  5. #5
    Sweetchuck's Avatar
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    Default Re: ***** Jokes...

    These two pollacks get married and they're driving to Omaha for their honeymoon. Hey, they're polish. So they're driving along and the guy puts his hand on his wife's knee and she says "now that we're married, you can go a little further", so he drives to Vegas.

    ... it's all I got.


  6. #6
    Palmetto Steel's Avatar
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    Default Re: ***** Jokes...

    HEY!.... My mother was Polish!..... ........................

    Seriously, she was..... Last name (maiden name) of Niedzialek.
    "You only have one life, and you will not get out alive. Make the most of your time and have no regrets." - Me.

  7. #7
    Sweetchuck's Avatar
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    Default Re: ***** Jokes...

    Yeah, I'm quite the pollack myself.

    My last name is a catastrophe. It's actually how I got my nickname because it sort of resembles 'Sweetchuck'.

    8 letters, one vowel, I'm not ****ting you.

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