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Thread: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieving the "Worst Fans in Sports" Title

      
  1. #1
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    Default The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieving the "Worst Fans in Sports" Title

    This is the all inclusive guide to helping us finally achieve the worst fans in sports title. Come one, come all! Let's win this thing.

    1. Remember, while your life sucks, Pittsburgh Sports Teams shouldn't.

    Yes, your wife is fat, disgusting, has a strange consistently worsening odor, and rules you with an iron fist. But, that doesn't mean that you can't take your inner anger about your failed relationship out on Steelers sports forums. Remember, just because your life sucks, doesn't mean that the Steelers shouldn't be 16-0 and win the Superbowl 9 million consecutive seasons in a row. That's right! Just because you can't achieve the ferrari, the supermodel of a wife bearing your 10 blond haired blue eyed yinzer children, while living in the secluded beach house mansion in the Caribbean doesn't mean the Steelers shouldn't be perfect! If the Steelers have an 8-8 year, it makes life unbearable! 16-0 is only acceptable. Granted, since the Superbowl era began over 1100 different NFL teams have suited up, and only 2 have gone through the regular season perfect. Yes, the chance of it happening is .0018, but hey, it's why you buy lottery tickets every week "to live the dream" you've always wanted..

    2. Even if they win, find the weaknesses, and make sure it's known on the Steelers forums all week long!

    They might have won 48-6, but the left side of the offensive line let 2 sacks! Reed botched one that should have been hit. The power play went 1 for 5. Even if your fat *** can't even get into a offensive stance, that doesn't mean that you can't make it known to the Steelers forum how bad the left side of the offensive line is, and it's a glaring sign to you that the season is over! That's right. Even during great victories, there is a major defeat. Remember, there are no bright spots, only dark clouds on the horizon! Even when they win the Superbowl, or hoist a Stanley Cup, it's only a matter of a year until they are drafting first in the draft. So, make sure everyone around knows that this team has major holes, AT ALL TIMES, and that it eventually will destroy the team, and turn the city into a black hole. So, hop out of that telephone booth, run to your laptop and save the world, Mr Ugly Yinzer, because the teams coaches need your input to know about the impending disaster about to be unleashed onto your team!

    3. Philly, and Yankee fans have nothing on us! What have you done for me today, *******!

    Reed sucks. Tomlin needs shown the door. Fleury is done. Malkin needs traded. Polamalu is finished. What have you done for me today, *******! Seriously, you didn't throw for 400 yards today, Ben. TRADE THE BUM! Tomlin and crew has lost 2 of the last 3. Time to fire his *** and replace him with Wade Phillips. Previous history of winning it all doesn't matter. Odds of winning don't matter, even if they are weighted good for a talented team like ours. NOPE! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR ME TODAY, *******!

    http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/10288/1095354-66.stm

    True, Fleury and Reed have helped their teams to win championship. There was nothing like Fleury making that last second save to hoist the cup...but god dammit did you see those two softies he gave up, last night? TRADE HIM! TRADE HIM NOW! WE can do better!

    4. Booing and mocking those worthless no-talent players during nationally televised games is a sign of ultimate class!

    Cordial nice fans? Not a chance. Reed didn't get that 46 yard field goal. Ben just went 3 and out. Fleury just left in a softy. WELL THAT CAN"T BE! It's time for the ugly yinzer to stand up and revolt against this madness! Let's have a stadium wide mock-session on national TV to show the nation how much we detest the players on our team. Come on ugly yinzers, stand up and lets boo and mock our team, that way the players have an incentive to win for classy fans like us!

    5. Without my teams winning titles, life just ain't worth living!

    So, the Penguins just lost their fourth game in the playoff series, the Steelers just lost a close one in the AFC Championship. You can either slit your wrists, and join the end times.... OR you can hop on the forum and ***** ***** ***** all day long, and all year long to channel out your frustrations. Wait a second, is that your wife calling? Better hurry, she wants her to rub the lint out of her fat disgusting feet, again.

    6. Don't ever let go of what happened in the past!

    Yeah, last year the team had a string of letdowns, and with this year, there were personnel changes, a tweaking in management, and a whole new group of draft picks to get excited about, HOWEVER that doesn't mean squat. What matters is that last year the team lost a bunch of games in a row, and this year, the same thing is going to happen, because HISTORY always repeats itself the following year. Also, it must always be stated that negative points in history, shall always trump positive points in history. For example, in 2009 the Steelers were 6-3 (just like the teams in 08, and this year) and lost 5 games in a row. While the team in 2008 also started 6-3 and ended up finishing out 12-4, only losing a game to Tennessee at the tail end of the season during a 6 out of 7 game run, which would later turn into 9 out of 10 and a championship. HOWEVER, the more disastrous season of 2009 will always trump the Superbowl year of 2008, because history always carries a more negative context in Pittsburgh. Expect defeat over victory.

    7. A single flaw is a detriment, and no matter what, improvement can not be achieved, EVER, unless people are fired and cut!

    True, Pittsburgh's highly stressed out work culture ranks as one of the most depressing and worst in the country. You have suit and tie slave masters (most of them highly obese, and with anger management issues) looking over all their drones, constantly applying pressure while wages are cut, and benefits go out the door. The Pittsburgh work culture is already on the edge, since it's an entirely stressful environment to achieve greater success. The same sort of cultural atmosphere is applied to sports teams. If a coach, or a team has a flaw, remember that there is never room for improvement, unless the whole group is cut, and a bunch of new players or coaches are in place. Think like a typical pittsburgh white collar slave, and apply it to your sports teams. This is the yinzer way. You're either a god at what you do and you always achieve perfection, or a jagoff with no room for improvement. So, cut the jagoffs, even if the team is left with only a handful of players, and one coach.
    Last edited by foslrock; Nov-16-2010 at 10:18 PM.
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  2. #2
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    GREAT AND FUNNY READ!!! and boy does it fit a members of message boards quite well!!!!

    Come'on foslrock!!! Didn't you know every win during the 70's was by the score of 56-0???
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Pretty well written

    Some parts I just don't agree with from a personal level...

    We the fans pay the players salaries through ridiculous ticket prices, concessions, tv ad revenue, direct tv packages, merchandise etc... We have a right to boo them, want them traded if they don't live up to our personal level of satisfaction and be ****ed when they do poorly. If it weren't for us fans and our interest and love of the sport or the team, these players wouldn't have the jobs they have now. They wouldn't be getting paid millions to play a kids game.

    I also agree that most fans are a bunch of whining, sniveling drama queens that take what is a form of "entertainment" far too seriously. Anyone that says "this is a way of life" might have an addiction problem It's alright to be ****ed of or disgusted but you need to be able to walk away

    Fans are a bunch of band wagoners for the most part. They support you when you are doing great, they hate you when you're doing poor and unless you are a superstar, they don't really like you all that much. You are "Acceptable" until something better comes along In a lot of those cases, I suppose it is fine but in all of these cases this is natural and every sports player has to know this and expect and accept it. I don't care what any player says, When they claim that they hold themselves to a higher level than anyone else they are full of ****. the fans are holding those players to a higher level. Players earning millions and multiple thousands through guaranteed contracts aren't probably caring as much as fans. Maybe that's good, maybe it;s bad. Fans tend to care too much in many cases then again "fan" is short for "fanatic" not "casual observer"

    Jeff Reed though? Seriously, stop whining. You failed on the field and you've been failing all season long compared to your peers. You have no problems making an *** out of yourself in public trying to pick fights with cops and beating up on towel dispensers while you're **** faced and now you're going to whine like a ***** because the fans are fed up with both your personal life bull**** and your short comings on the field? I have a solution for Jeff Reed... Shut up, do your job a hell of a lot better and stop being a public ******bag or get the hell out of town.

    The Standard Is The Standard and The Pittsburgh Sports Forum Is The Standard

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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by bdeff View Post
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    GREAT AND FUNNY READ!!! and boy does it fit a members of message boards quite well!!!!

    Come'on foslrock!!! Didn't you know every win during the 70's was by the score of 56-0???
    I thought it was a great read. Pittsburghers unfortunately for being as die hard as they are (and no other city really comes close in the US for this type of die hard sports allegience) are also spoiled. Gve em the taste of championship gold and suddenly expectation levels are ridiculously high across the board and panic tends to set in way too early and way to often.

    Sometimes listening to talk radio or reading message boards or blogs...even twitter and facebook I swear that it looks like 90% of people are going to have a **** stroke or heart attack
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by Kipper View Post
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    I thought it was a great read. Pittsburghers unfortunately for being as die hard as they are (and no other city really comes close in the US for this type of die hard sports allegience) are also spoiled. Gve em the taste of championship gold and suddenly expectation levels are ridiculously high across the board and panic tends to set in way too early and way to often.

    Sometimes listening to talk radio or reading message boards or blogs...even twitter and facebook I swear that it looks like 90% of people are going to have a **** stroke or heart attack
    Living in and around Pittsburgh for 25 years, and in a healthy, active ski town in the west for over a decade, i've come to the conclusion that the negative pessimistic atmosphere is part of Pittsburghs culture. I think part of it might be from how the town practically died during the 70's and 80's, and it's hard for the culture to shake that...so there is a lot of lingering pessimism with a good percentage of the population there. It becomes really evident with the sports teams though. That culture of lingering pessimism starts to really shine through.
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by foslrock View Post
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    Living in and around Pittsburgh for 25 years, and in a healthy, active ski town in the west for over a decade, i've come to the conclusion that the negative pessimistic atmosphere is part of Pittsburghs culture. I think part of it might be from how the town practically died during the 70's and 80's, and it's hard for the culture to shake that...so there is a lot of lingering pessimism with a good percentage of the population there. It becomes really evident with the sports teams though. That culture of lingering pessimism starts to really shine through.
    There is a pessimistic feeling. I agree. Not having lived elsewhere in a metro of similar size or larger I have no idea if it's similar elsewhere. There's this whole "everything sucks around here" belief and vibe for whatever reason that extends outside of sports and can't really be correlated to the steel industry anymore since it's generations after that practice this.

    I don't know. Maybe it's the ****ty *** northern weather. That's my blame for personal negativity. Not enough sun, too ****ing cold
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Now who is going to write the piece on how to be a huge homer Pittsburgh sports fan who can overlook or defend every single negative thing about Pittsburgh teams? How many of you homer fans were pointing to our awesome mid season record last year, saying there was nothing to worry about, and making fun of fans that were pointing at the issues....only to watch 5 defeats in a row to the perennial loser teams of the NFL?
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Pittsburgh View Post
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    Now who is going to write the piece on how to be a huge homer Pittsburgh sports fan who can overlook or defend every single negative thing about Pittsburgh teams? How many of you homer fans were pointing to our awesome mid season record last year, saying there was nothing to worry about, and making fun of fans that were pointing at the issues....only to watch 5 defeats in a row to the perennial loser teams of the NFL?
    Forgot another one. Thanks for the reminder.

    6. Don't ever let go of what happened in the past!

    Yeah, last year the team had a string of letdowns, and with this year, there were personnel changes, a tweaking in management, and a whole new group of draft picks to get excited about, HOWEVER that doesn't mean squat. What matters is that last year the team lost a bunch of games in a row, and this year, the same thing is going to happen, because HISTORY always repeats itself the following year. Also, it must always be stated that negative points in history, shall always trump positive points in history. For example, in 2009 the Steelers were 6-3 (just like the teams in 08, and this year) and lost 5 games in a row. While the team in 2008 the Steelers were also 6-3 and ended up finishing out 12-4, only losing a game to Tennessee at the tail end of the season during a 6 out of 7 game run, which would later turn into 9 out of 10 and a championship. HOWEVER, the more disastrous season of 2009 will always trump the Superbowl year of 2008, because history always carries a more negative context in Pittsburgh. Expect defeat over victory.
    Last edited by foslrock; Nov-16-2010 at 11:59 AM.
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by foslrock View Post
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    HOWEVER, the more disastrous season of 2009 will always trump the Superbowl year of 2008, because history always carries a more negative context in Yinzerland.
    Yes, because our defense that was already long in the tooth in 2008 found a time machine in Bruce Arians *** and all got younger.
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Pittsburgh View Post
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    Yes, because our defense that was already long in the tooth in 2008 [HIGH-LIGHT]found a time machine in Bruce Arians *** [/HIGH-LIGHT]and all got younger.
    I'd have expected a foil-wrapped cucumber...
    'I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ***-kickers, ****-kickers and Methodists.'
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Pittsburgh View Post
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    Yes, because our defense that was already long in the tooth in 2008 found a time machine in Bruce Arians *** and all got younger.
    Jeez.. thanks for reminding me on anther one. I feel like Jane Goodell studying her subjects..

    7. A single flaw is a detriment, and no matter what, improvement can not be achieved, EVER, unless people are fired and cut!

    True, Pittsburgh's highly stressed out work culture ranks as one of the most depressing and worst in the country. You have suit and tie slave masters (most of them highly obese, and with anger management issues) looking over all their drones, constantly applying pressure while wages are cut, and benefits go out the door. It's an entirely stressful environment to achieve greater success. The same sort of cultural atmosphere is applied to sports teams. If a coach, or a team has a flaw, there is never room for improvement, unless the whole group is cut, and a bunch of new players or coaches are in place. This is the yinzer way. You're either a god at what you do and you always achieve perfection, or a jagoff with no room for improvement. So, cut the jagoffs, even if the team is left with only a handful of players, and one coach.
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieve the Worst Fans in Sports Title

    It just amazes me the negativity in regards to something that you (or I) as a fan have no control over.

    Literally, no more than 30 minutes after SB XLIII or XL on the old Trib (I believe)? Fans were bemoaning who were going to be leaving in Free Agency.

    I am in no means a "Homer" just to those of you WHO ARE CONSTANTLY NEGATIVE about everything sports related, and you know who you are just try to lighten up a little.

    I do have a theory, that these types of CONSTANTLY NEGATIVE messageboard fans, have totally annoyed everyone in their real life with their *****ing, moaning, negative attitudes, that message boards are the last place that anyone will even listen to them. They are the guy who you see and are like "Oh ****, I am going to hear how miserable he is", and you try to avoid at all costs.

    You know, "How are you Steve (TOTAL EXAMPLE)?" Steve: Terrible my car needs work and some shingles blew off the roof, Stevie Jr. had the runs last night and I have been fighting with the wife.

    Once in a while its fine, but more often than not, Its just Steve's personality and after awhile, no one wants to deal with that person.
    Last edited by bdeff; Nov-16-2010 at 12:27 PM.
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieving the "Worst Fans in Sports" Title

    I hate to admit it, but looking at this article subjectively, it's somewhat 100% true.

    http://deadspin.com/5354828/why-your...burgh-steelers
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieving the "Worst Fans in Sports" Title



    I honestly think that many people around western PA suffer from chronic depression. People out here in Wyoming are alot happier in general than back in the Burgh area.
    Last edited by Skeeter; Nov-17-2010 at 06:04 AM.
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  15. #15
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    Default Re: The Ugly Hateful Yinzers Guide to Achieving the "Worst Fans in Sports" Title

    The biggest thing I see in a lot of the comments is that people think there is "always someone else better".

    We could get ANY coach better than BA
    We could get ANY QB to do better than Ben
    We could get ANY goalie to do better than MAF

    Maybe, when someone does take over for them and has a little hot streak, we say "see", told you. Not thinking that there is a reason people are unemployed first or a career backup.

    And, when/if we fire BA - we will be ALL OVER the hiring process, and ripping the next person hired because he didn't meet the expectation in our heads as to the "perfect replacement".

    Yes, being a HOMER is just as bad. But at least being a HOMER doesn't stress people out.

    I love the Pittsburgh teams no matter what, and get frustrated when they lose. And guess what, after the Pats* loss, I still had to get up and go to work tomorrow, and deal with the real stresses at work (one of which is listening to co-workers go on and on about the loss).

    It's sports, in the grand scheme of things, it's not all that important.
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